Spammers Galore

This past week I found my spam comments (apparently they’re sometimes called “blam“). I’ve blogged here for over a year and never once have I gone in to take a look at the comments that WordPress so kindly filters out for me. They are honestly a bit ridiculous. And I think my brain would go numb if I had to read through them all to get to the real ones and my sense of the English language might take a severe down-hill spiral! So WordPress, thank you SO much for taking on this task for me.

Take a look at some of these and tell me that they’re compelling enough to click the links or follow up with the advertisements (you’ll have to click the comment to actually read/view it; I’ve tried editing and making them larger to no avail. But trust me–it’s totally worth it!):

On a post about being thankful, I get this eloquently worded comment. Apparently, I have a “good deal knowledge about this particular, and thus [due to my knowledge, if I understand this correctly] a good deal enthusiasm”. I totally appreciate that BUYING FAKE HIGH TOP GUCCI SHOES feels that I will be able to “get people moving”, as well. And “the size of what I’m saying” (??), well… that just goes without saying!

This one might seriously be my favorite. Only because the spammer is suggesting that the readers of a blog about Forestry Trucks would enjoy what I posted here. Are you serious, Clark? Sure!! Post away, and let me know how that goes over, MR. FORESTRY-TRUCK-BLOGGER!

It seems that BACKLINKS PYRAMID feels as if she finally needs to confess something: I have an excellent blog. I guess Dinner with Friends was all it took to convince her??? And yes. I “does” get much traffic, thanks for asking!

Hold the freaking phone!!! KIM KARDASHIAN just commented on my blog!? That means she reads it! Well, she read one post. Whew, at least it was a pretty good one. AND she knows my name… it just keeps getting better! Wait, she has “combat experience as a military veteran” and she wants to discuss the fixed-rate mortgage with me? My hopes are “dashed”… Kim Kardashian did not stop by Life is Grace.

Maybe it’s me, but about any of these stellar spam comments causes me to do anything but check that little box next to it and click the action “delete permanently”. Not even Kim Kardashian’s willingness to help me buy my first home.